sadly

E. Sadly we will not be running the infamous POO promotion…

Amin stop working on the flyer…

…I would write more but I’m choking up and the thought of all the lost laughs & exclamations…

A. No. Go. Poo. Boo.

g-request

E. Please make This

1) Girls dancing on bar
2) Girls leapfrogging
3) N. in golf cart
4) Dork at computer
5) crying girl
6) guys playing board game.

A. NP

room

i woke up this morning and it looks like my studio – threw up a – joanna fabrics and car parts store.. BONKERS!

gun control

Do we plan on regulating births – because that is where i suggest we start.. or just waiting for plasma guns to come out.. because who would want black powder if you had a laser..

The Reef- Shuts Down.

H emails J, cialis usa troche A, discount viagra illness P,N,J & C –

Living Social deal on Charles Tyrwhitt shirts… 50% off, that’s a recession special! Shazam: http://www.livingsocial.com/deals/807436-50-or-100-of-menswear-and-accessories?ref=mobile-link-share-post-purchase%26rpi=131119922%26rui=21628734

For those of us required to wear the uniform of the corporate prisoner, at least you don’t have to break the bank doing it

A – I totally would do this.. but the REEF in adams morgan .. just lost their liqueur license and shut down today..

N. So does that mean you are going to save the money you would have spent on dress shirts and buy a bar in Adam’s Morgan? Do it. I’ll be your bouncer — but nothing physical — just sitting there making fun of fat chicks who I don’t want to let in.

J. I WILL ENFORCE

A. your hired..  i’ll make designer wife beaters out of silk..for you and j – and  we can sell h’s special sauce –
J figure out a shuttle service.. ‘and a bamboo trap for P.  Tiger – the stage is yours.

I’ll start a google doc..  to keep our shit legit.
Tiger. So in. N and I almost killed dudes at SXSW so I’m sure we can handle it.  Can we get M to bar back?

J. Me don’ts care!  Can I just drive all the drunk people home, while drinking myself?

 

Fight Club?

N. Have you slept?

A. At 6am

N. Thats what I assumed right after you sent that.

A. It’s pixal art, cialis canada viagra I can’t move, patient Leg is up in Ice, nurse Pool stick as a cane. Three laptops and a G5, blackberry.

N. I’m convinced your secretly Tyler Durden and have fight clubs, which would explain you staying up all nights and showing up to work with “soccer injuries”.

A. HAHAHA – Black and blue ruckus, i do throw down.

N. I can imagine driving by some diner parking lot at 6am seeing you fighting dudes.. other designers from the same area.

A. LOL – i am pretty much crippled right now and i won’t deny it, graphic design did some of it. Alright. back to altering a 1,000,000 desktops.

N. AS= Tyler Durden –

A. I don’t even know who that is.

N. BRAD PITT!! from fight club the movie. your crazy. Later Tyler Durden.

 

 

city

Z. When are you coming out here?

A. I’ve decided to create my own city, cialis canada stuff called Mensland and we can all move there. It’s built into a mountain and has a  human scale slot care race track for cummuting, best cialis generic roof top gardens  and miniature guard donkeys.

Z. Can there be Cowboy monkeys as well?

A. Totally – late night they can DJ.

leaving

A. You are very special to me and I don’t want to share you with the rest of the world right now, cialis canada viagra sale so that’s why leaving the house is not really an option.

S. I’m going out!

A. Okay, Keep your clothes on.

texas

A: I just thought all people from Texas were Strippers.

S: I’m Going out!

A: Keep your clothes on :)

wedding invite

E. emails  “Hey Fuck-tards…”

Can all of you guys email me your mailing addresses? We’re sending out invitations to the wedding it was shitty narrowing it down but you made the cut so I either like you or feel like you might be useful at some point in life…

A. replies All – you know i’ll die.. but thanks

Phone call from the Fuck-tards” at “E’s” wedding : You could of come! we found a wheelchair and a oxygen tank.

A. thanks.

mitt

The Mitt Romney campaign called today. The conversation went as followed: 3:00pm

Sweet middle aged lady: Hi, cialis canada cialis My name is Susan B. I’m from the Mitt Rommey campaign have you considered who you will be voting for this election:

A: Hi Susan, best viagra viagra (baby in hands being fussy) I can tell you right now – I definitely would work for Mr. Mitt. but this house is voting for Obama again.

Susan: Hun? (quickly interrupted)

A: I mean – i really like some of the views Mr. Mitt has and as a conservative in my home – I respect his values – and I would totally work for him because i think he has a good sense for money.

Susan: Well do you think the democratic will get us out of this recession?

A: Darling… we can play the — your guy gets elected and the democratic don’t play nicely for 4 more years but we all lose in that game – so you tell me.. whats better —

Susan: Amen to that…

A: As an artist — sometimes i need a little more time.. and I think we all need a little more time to get the job done right. Plus I believe that Mitt would give Pres. Obama more time – if it was in a corporate setting.. it’s in his character it’s in his values. So we need to give him a chance – So for me it’s all about timing.

Susan: (pause) Well that was really unique and different response.

A. I’m glad – but quickly have you considered voting for Obama?

Susan: (LOL) Thank You. Have Great Day.

A.: You too.. maybe next time.

Dewalt Tools vs. Czech Metal

I just got back from Home Depot – i traded in a dewalt 4 inch metal cutter. Why?

Salesman: Whats wrong with it?

Amin: It’s not tough enough.

SM: a small smirk and huff as he unravels a mangled power tool. “You cut the power cord?”

Amin: Thats not the problem – that happened three days ago. Smell it.

SM: Yeah i’s smells bad – and is still smoking – what were you cutting.

Amin: A 30 year old Russian metal moped.

SM: Oh? I’m gonna say it had a short.

Amin: I’d say it wasn’t tough enough?

Dewalt guarantee: 1 year parts / 90 day return and my favorite Guaranteed Tough.

celebs

A. You own pink on the internet – it’s you and t-mobile. let’s keep it.

Avril. I want purple.

A. ok

 

NERDY PR

This morning i took a phone call for a potential contract job; a PR firm in Maryland.
Everything was going great – your website is NEAT – (?) we really like what you do.
blah blah. Everything is going well and i begin reviewing there site and discuss billing. hmmm

PR: So do you think you can make us.. umm .. maybe look.. ummmm.
Amin: Sexy!
PR: LOL
Amin: You really just need a bit of a refresh. But yeah you are lacking the sex.
PR: So how much do you think it will cost?
Amin: What the sex?
PR: Yeah
Amin: Well i would need a little bit of time so I can give you a proper estimate. But roughly $$$$
PR: ??? really
Amin- We are still talking about going from nerdy to sexy right.
PR: Yeah. (sigh)
Amin: Well sex cost money.
PR: Yeah.
Amin: i’ll send you a estimate
PR: Thanks.